Wednesday, May 19, 2010

A Stream of Thought

Truth is Requested .. .. ..

I see, as I walk
   by them - all the people
in my universe - they are there,
populating my world -
these flesh and bone and blood,
not much different from mine .. .. ..
yet -
we don't trust each other,
we glance quickly, and then away.. .. ..
we look for full answers
to our questions
and whisper our hearts' thoughts,
is she thinking this or that?
oh, who is the person I
see before me?
the same as I witness in the mirror?
the raw materials say so little.. .. ..
mean so little.. .. ..
                 just a thin 
                           layer of dirt
                                         on us all.. .. ..

as we walk by each other,
we try to project what we feel,
and think, perhaps our philosophy,
our respect, or dis-respect
for the others around us.. .. ..
What are we trying to say?
                   "Love Me?"
is that the cry of all humankind?
from the infant to
the great grandmother
wrapped in a lonely shawl,
       rocking her days away
                    on her solitary chair . . .

we walk into the unknown
when we reach out to the other
with no defenses except retreat
from destruction through despair.
why can't I see into all the hearts
of the lonely people,
for we are all lonely,
turned in,
           trying to understand .. .. ..
                         trying to find 
                                    some meaning to it all . . .

I look at the man with the face
    so malformed
   the others stare in fascination,
      or glance quickly away.. .. ..
who is this man behind the painful
Where does his heart live?
and why do we see
him as one of the punished?
         are we?
                  to see?
                          the rawness?   
                                           in that one?

turned inside out we are all
          the same . . .
demons and
unsung heroes live within
        our pains not visible,
our scars
our treasures .. .. ..
         a faint smile on our lips,
but who could read
           such cryptic messages?
                                         who would?
                          who can see 
                                         the secret hurts?

turn aside then
      close the doors to your soul
        reveal no thing!
I can then only guess .. .. ..
as a witness to life .. .. ..
                What more can you 
                                   expect of me?

we look for clues,
like fish in the shadowy
      depths of the ocean
look for crumbs,
while hiding from the dangers .. .. ..
darting out .. .. ..
occasionally fooled
by the predator
and then all is lost .. .. ..
is that the fear we realize?
when we hide 
    have our secrets,
but what is new under this
     sun or
         that one?
we protect ourselves,
                       for the predator 
                                  will consume us
                                                and all of our progeny .. .. ..

yet, if I can know
the deepest - deepest
          heart of you,
if I can find that
most vulnerable
     member of the community of you,
will my heart not be
                and in love
                            with the human you are?

are we not all vulnerable,
    each of us alone on the
crowded reef?
     that crumb that floats by
do we not all long for it?
    we lunge for it
           or rest in complex shadows
as the light floats down
     in streams
   and darkens our abstract dreams
                         revealing significant
                                                          from within us .. .. ..

will we ever really know the other?
are we so destined to remain such
mysteries to each other?


what does it all mean in the
end to me .. .. .. ?
for I am the center of my own universe
the impact of the other on me
is profound .. .. ..
as is mine on them .. .. ..
yet it means nothing
to anyone else .. .. ..
                      for it is only shadow play,
                                           in the depths of the reef,
                                                                  a vivid flash, and
   then all is done.. .. ..



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